Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Mina's Top Eleven People To Kill List, In No Particular Order

1. People who still think typIngGggG LykE DiS IzZz Kewl.

2. Jaywalkers who wait until the light is green to run across the road. Green means go for cars, and you are not a Honda, this I can assure you.

3. Parents who think their spoilt, screaming babies break the sound barrier in a vacuum where nobody can hear them. The entire neighbourhood can. Really.

4. People who take forever to buy their fifty thousand smarmy valentine cards while you synapse behind them with an armload of books, exact change and mother waiting in car.

5. Aunties who grab the kapra you're fingering at Auriga/Depot/anywhere right out of your hand. Hello, I wasn't done yet. And stop trying to push me aside- your butt may be five times bigger but I am a stubborn skinny girl.

6. People who pull your bandanna backwards so you have to spend five minutes untying and retying it. It is NOT funny.

7. Whoever made the Bahria Town infomercial. Actually, every infomercial ever made. What in God's name is the Gymkhana guy doing asking people about earthquakes anyway?

8. People who dog-ear their pages and splay their books face-down instead of using a bookmark. Show some respect; if you can't then please watch television like regular amoeba people do.

9. People who talk about stupid things sitting behind you in class or at a funeral- I don't want to know why you ate six bananas yesterday or why you fought with your lover who is the reason for your phone incessantly ringing. Promise.

10. Strangers on Orkut. Please Go Away. I swear I don't want to be your frand no matter how nice jolly friendly sweet and caring you are.

11. Smelly people. Scent is eminently controllable; please don't make other people ill with your miscreant hygiene regimen.

Mina at 10:48 PM