Thursday, September 29, 2005

ho ho so much rebellion the mullick eldest is, not only did i not go to class (collective gasp, et al) my messenger bag is not on the shelf with the other bags, but sitting on the table next to me! ha! ha ha ha! (like mandark laughs in dexter)

i am so bored 'tis unbeleeeevable. i think i will proceed with novel and screw the rest of the world but if i do that how will i get to go to NYU, please to be telling me? i am not yet enough liberal rebel to not have a degree, to drop out of college and write the Jreat Pakistan Digest-Naavel. i wish i had more gumption like that. mummydaddy wouldn't mind so much, they are by now inured to mina's Great And Marvellous Plans and better than that, never come up with dampening deadpan statements like 'if you go to school in spain your academics will be compromised'. mashallah, nazar na lagey.

i just calculated (and t'was a job let me tell you) all manner of statistical nonsense about a cricket team selection for maths (how quaint, someone once said to me, that you still call it 'maths' like it were an o level period), which i did. just as i was feeling very diligent and go-getter finder of solutions on my own and ho ho so excel savvy and all of that when i realised- 'count' chalaya jab- keh instead of ELEVEN people, my team had NINE people! the supah-stah got to B11, saw the 11 and said 'okay, i have eleven people now because the row number is eleven' and neglected to realise that the list starts from B THREE, not ONE. what the?! i'm not calculating everything all over again, the point is to do all the math gibberish and i done it and i 'aint doin' it again. neener-neener. sigma over mju into hundred, co'fishent of variation. stocostic (when it is in fact sto-chAs-tic) experiments. it's unbelievable that i should be subjected to such concepts. when i am a fascist dictator i will also make math an entirely voluntary subject to take once you know how to do enough math to get the mahiney ka sauda. you don't need to know how to integrate to live.

there's a CD (man alive i love to procrastinate) sitting here next to me that is bright blue and says 'MEGA collection' and purportedly contains inside its mysterious silver rainbows (volume 16), the following fillums:
ishq hai tum se
munna bhai mbbs
woh tera naam tha

(the latter two are in fact in capital letters)

who names films anyway? woh tera naam tha? what're you talking about, an anonymous internet sms? 'ohhh, woh TERA naam tha, no wonnderrr'. and plan? plan? might as well have called it 'table' or 'chair' or 'dullerthanthebacksideofadungbeetle'. 'plan'. hnh.

the onion's latest edition has some absolute gems, my personal favourite is the article on the philo student who needs to 'shut the f**k up' in class hahaha which reminds me of the sad news tony told me. it is raining, my heart is paining like nobody's business. 'tis a sad, sad day when the biggest prat, the one person who never had an original, let alone coherent thought in class is the TA. and to add insult to injury...oh never mind. gorpy is so awami now that someone who knows said person will read this and then boo hoo mina is so evvvaaalll, so sour graaaayyypussss, minner-minner-minner. pah! i care not! time to eat sammich and be cheerful again. speaking of food, butt got me starburst and Allah Miyaan ussko superstar zindagi de because really. 'tis only fair.

(PS: K's kashmir jaunt was most successful, to make the fashion show a little more desi the models catwalked with a goat or two- asal main)

Mina at 12:36 PM