Wednesday, May 11, 2005

(happy birthday cowboy chess-boy, blogger chewed it up yesterday).

onwards to the rant of the day!

i want to

specially the ones that contradict themselves and just go on doing it and are convinced they're right!!!!! ARGhgGHgHGGHGHGhghHH!!!! today! in class! i swear the teacher's a bit too nice for her own good, i would have really let the fool have it....uff ufff i almost walked out of class when he waved an arm and declared grandiosely that he rejected the entire post-colonial discourse and also that lots of sub-conty people write living in the West, like Manto and Chughtai. i wanted to rip my arm off and whack him on the head with it.

"have you done the reading?"
"no, i had a presentation ( does the word 'multi-task' mean anything to you?), but i know what deconstruction is about."
*skeptical look* "okay, why don't you tell us then."
"well. in the scientific sphere deconstruction is an organic dissemenation of the structure of living things and life but in the SS method of construction deconstruction is taking apart a text to discover what the meaning of the text is."
*the class (in other words me, H and the teacher) blink*

this guy would put the champion of the sophists to utter and complete shame. it's too much. he babbles on and on saying absolutely nothing and contradicting himself and when you point that out, he says 'that's what i was saying'. no, when you said that farhat hashmi was training an army of women to propagate the patriarchy through Islam you were pretty much saying that, you ignorant bullshitter! when i told him that Islam didn't propagate the patriarchy as far as my knowledge extends and that it would be slightly presumptuous to assume that Dr.Hashmi is part of some nefarious chauvinist plot to take over the world he didn't argue. he said "i didn't say 'patriarchy'."


why, why, why me?!

"what do you think of lawrence's definition of consciousness?"
"weeellll....can you really define consciousness because it is something undefinable, because there is a yak on the top of a mountain in nepal. i disagree"

when in doubt, dissent. and not just dissent, but say something so utterly stupid that everyone who hears it will shrivel up and die of shock anyway so nobody will take-o you.

"there is no way that we're influenced by the West!"

he said this. he actually said that in our lives there is nothing to say that it's influenced by the west and that there was no such thing as the after-effects of colonialism on a people. and also that there are sooo many people living abroad and writing about our 'archaic traditions', and i quote him. archaic traditions?! what?!!? have you gone quite potty? and then he also held forth on how we should have an extra-long session on tuesday so that he could get out of presenting on monday because he's in the annual play on the weekend, AND that he has two papers due on monday. so do i, bozo! if you can't handle work then don't do plays! i'm probably being too critical here but frankly speaking, i wanted to throw a shoe at his head. i have the same papers due, and i'm not whingeing about putting everyone else through hell just so he gets one extra day to write down an ABSTRACT to READ OUT in hard is that?!?! eik to this phrase's become my takiya kalam but i swear to Allah Miyaan people are so annoying i want to throw rocks at them. did i mention that he had the temerity to suggest i swap presentation days with him? the pre-assigned presentation dates? is there 'doormat' tattooed across my forehead? "i'm sure mina won't mind"- newsflash! yes she will! with or without you spewing gibberish for seventy-five minutes!


i feel better now. it isn't easy being a misanthropic master evil genius, i tell you. and i gotta finish me stories and i found out i can't apply for the fulbright which is pissin' me off. kya museebat! when will i get me a hi-fi intellectual label!? but maybe i can land that fellowship in spain and take off after graduation, woo hoo!

OH and the most AMAZING thing happened yesterday, which i will wax lyrical on later 'cause abhi puppet is prolly here to pick us up. puppet is our new driver and is also one of the people i most want to throw rocks at. he's a good person, only irritating. and cocky as hell because he doesn't know i know how to drive and thus when i tell him to get out of the road-trash (rickshas, rehris, gadhey-gaariyan) lane or brake sooner he thinks i'm just a dumb female. i had to pinjo the cultus to ayesha's house to convince his predecessor; with this one i'm just going to make him pull over the next time he tries to race with two buses (and subsequently scare sana out of a month of sundays) and drive home myself. and leave him on the kerb too.

Mina at 2:55 PM